marriage part 2

i came from a family where a number of members chose to grow old, single. not because they don't have anyone to get married with. in fact, they have gone with a number of past relationships. but they've just chose not to for reasons they didn't want to tell us when we asked them when we were kids and we wouldn't dare asking when we grew up.
yesterday, me and a friend talked about settling down. she has been in a relationship for nine years now and presently in doubt. this is because her boyfriend's us visa was just approved after a long time of processing and waiting. she confessed to me that honestly for the first time she was unsure. she doesn't believed in long distance relationship. despite the fact that her boyfriend already promised her to get her once he have managed to settle down with a job and a decent(there goes the word again) home.
i asked her, what if both of them then realized that they were not really meant to each other after all. she answered me that she thinks she would cry hard because she could no longer imagine herself without him around and that she is already used of having him for nine long years. but she believes that if it turned out that they are not really meant for one another, then be it.
i really felt sad hearing this from her which such sincerity and hid fear on her face. although she didn't tell me. i could feel that she was already preparing this to happen. she also confessed that she even asked her boyfriend for marriage. but the guy refused. i could just feel what she was feeling that time. considering i know her as a person that wouldn't ask for something out that easily. she is the type of person that would work hard for herself to achieved something than to instantly ask it out to someone else.
when i went out of the office and met my sister in robinson's place manila, i saw a couple of vagrants hugging one another as they sleep inside a small wooden cart. the cart was parked in a small alley along pedro gil st which was being passed by a very busy crowd. then, i wondered if they are married. i actually never bothered asking them. aside from the fact they were sleeping, i really don't have the guts to talk to someone i really don't know. but then i thought what if they weren't? what if they really couldn't afford getting married? what if its just enough for them to have one another regardless how hard things could be for them? those dramatic lines. well, i just noticed, atleast among most of my friends, that they don't value marriage that much anymore. for them, if having kids are blessings before. now, getting married is just a bonus of the entire partnership package. they are pretty much focused and contended of having a child than to get a lifetime partner or at the least, to get married. as early as 16, i already accepted and prepared myself to the fact that i might be the heir or the family's tradition. again, not because i think i am already hopeless or pessimistic about the possibility of getting married. but simply because as i have mentioned on my previous posts that i really don't believe in the concept of marriage. i always believe that such ceremony is just a bind created in papers, which might be very cliche to your ears now. but it really is. i would rather get married with my partner, hands laying flat in a sack of rice (no specific purpose, just for the symbolism of susteinance, i guess) and promising our best commitments to one another than to sign a paper infront of the public. for me, the whole point of the former is a matter of one's word of honor and love to keep a relationship. instead of keeping one outside of love and respect and only binded with the pressure of other people and institutions. probably, now, all i have to think of is how to have a baby in the future. i really can't afford to hire a baby maker yet. but since i think my sperm counts are still on its maximum and just to make sure i could make use of it before it runs out (yeah right?!), i am thinking of depositing in a sperm bank some for the right time to come. does anyone know if we have a sperm bank in the country? hahaha.