Wednesday, June 6, 2012

a realist take on hope

They say hope is important to keep one going. It keeps him centered and focused with a certain aspiration of eventually achieve something; despite the sheer absence of its possibilities and/or presence of obstacles and challenges.

Hope fuels persuasion and hard work but at the same time it can also prolong agonies and sorrows. Hence, it makes one wonder, where do you draw that line between still hoping and finally surrendering and move on?    

Most of the time, what makes moving on difficult is no longer the feelings you have or had with the person rather it is more into one’s confrontation with change. Our attachments with patterns and routines have chained us within the comfort zone that we have built together with that person.  

Bottomline: we are just scared of what is ahead--- alone; that for the first time again, we are subject to this fear of starting over and going back to square one. And regreting everything we had invested, gained and practically, enjoyed. At the end, it makes us restless realizing that the feeling is a concoction of both that nagging fear and concentrated frustration that chain us from something we kept refusing to admit as over.   

Sometimes, concern to that person is no longer brought about by what many ‘believed’ to be affection, but more of an unconscious effort of one’s sense of self-preservation to justify hope and simply avoid change.     

But before people start identifying me more of a pessimist rather than a realist, I guess, my point being is  one needs to realize that its no longer hope if it hurts, that it is no longer hope if the mutual journey "now," is vaguer than its initial destination. People should know when to know if the hope for that relationship is already exhausted and when the building of another hope timely begins.