Wednesday, January 16, 2008

"you smoke like a chimney"

" you smoke like a chimney," probably that would be the same line rico yan would have said to me. if i were claudine barreto in the movie dahil mahal na mahal kita.

i have been a heavy smoker for the past 6 years now and if there would be one thing that i would like to drop for the new year, this habit would be the top of my list. i started smoking young. when i entered college at the age of 16, i learned to smoke out of the necessity of my lifestyle. the reason might be petty as it seems but atleast it was not out of peer pressure or just to look pa-"astig" or "cool". i never find smoking that way.

during my college years, i needed to be awake most of the time for my studies and all of my extra currcular activities. unfortunatley, the weather in baguio is so conducive for sleeping. so most of the time i ended up sleeping during examination nights or the night before a presentation of a particular project or play. thus, i ventured in smoking and coffee for me to be awake. eventually, i developed and carried over the habit of smoking within my everyday life. i smoke atleast half pack a day for a regular one and more than a pack during days where i am finishing or rushing something and if i am drinking with my buddies.

yesterday, i met a very close friend that i haven't seen for a long time. we met on a nearby mall, had our "kamustahan" talks, and had bountiful dinner his treat. since it was an eat-all-you-can-buffet, i obviously exceeded my stomach limit that craved me to smoke. good thing, we took the outside table. i pull out a cigarette on my pocket and decided to lit it. then my friend noticed it. SHOOT! due to my very sharp memory, i actually forgot the fact that he despise smoking and in consequence i already prepared myself in a night-long litany.

ever since we were in college, he was only the person, aside from my family, who was against my vise. this will be a very long night, i thought. as expected, he kept on reiterating that i need to quit smoking. but i was surprised to see his mouth's endurance talking for how many hours should atleast dry out your throat right? he never talked that long before. although i have just told him that i already planned to quit it soon and also tried changing the topic, he still managed to bring it back, connect it to an entirely different subject and still kept on rubbing to quit it the whole time that we were together. eventually, i was beginning to annoy him. but please don't get me wrong. for me, he would probably be the nicest friend i could ever have and i know that he was only concern about me. but sometimes there are things that we need to consider that not even one's concern could answer.

one thing common among smokers or people hooked into a vise is that despite the fact that they are aware of the bad effects and the prohibitions thrown to it, they would not automatically drop it. while what other people don't understand is quitting is not easy as saying "quit it" or reiterating its negative effects. everything not an over night process. but we should also be conscious that these reasons should not just stop there.

i remembered a health oriented show that i have watched before that really strucked me. the guest doctor said that, "despite all the advises, forceful actions or reiterations of quitting smoking, if the smoker is not decided to stop smoking, all efforts will be useless."a smoke would eventually find other ways to satisfy the addiction like secretly smoking inside the toilet like my dad used to do it before or going to somewhere else where the people who are pushing him to quit is out of sight. quitting should come on the smoker himself not on the perseverance of other people. these outside factors should only serve as a reminder of the habit and not an annoying or a forceful persuasion. because sometimes the harder you grip the soap the more it would slip (can't think of any other analogy---hahaha).

2 comments:

chase said...

stop smoking na.. hehehe..

i dunno.. can't really comprehend what you guys go through if you want to quit.

i smoked like for a month.. and i despised its smell. and i quit just like that.

good luck though.. i wish you would end that terrible vise.

wanderingcommuter said...

yeah..

but its something really hard to explain that is why its harder to quit it. hehehe.

well, as ive mentioned in this entry. its a process and i am taking a short and might be along step-by-step process.

i feel quite guilty right now, typing a response on one hand. while holding a cigarette stick on the other. hehehe. sorry