they say, infidelity is as natural as love and sex. it is the product of something and not just a spur of a moment. either it is cause of a break away from monotony, emergence of someone deemed better or even a search of challenges and fulfillment of potentialities in life.
in a monogamous society like ours, infidelity is considered as a tabboo, a fruit of immorality and an icing on top of a pryer's tounge.
i met charles and alex way back during my college years. they have been together for three years during that time and they were the first people who introduced me to the concept of open relationship. based from them, an open relationship is a kind of an arrangement from which two individuals loving one another are not bound exclusively. for them, they can date and have sex to whoever they want as long as they know where they are going home and who they love at the end of the day.
probably by now, you are having hard time picturing it. i guess its a normal thing since i also have quite some difficulties digesting it as well the first time i heard it. but then i realized that it has something to do with how our society have reared us to only accept monogamous relationships. we were not informed nor even educated with the presence of such relationships in the sphere of humanity as a whole. and just like infidelity, it is a form of social deviance in our society that slowly climbing its way to our awareness.
surprisingly, the two confessed that despite being in an open relationship and dated several people, they haven't had sex with anyone yet. charles joked that they still consider themselves as conservatives. of course, a "yeah right?!" response immediately came out of my mouth. but alex butted in and defended his partner. he said, for them it is just a matter of exploring one self to life's wide possibilities and options. he added that it works for them and as a matetr of fact having such arrangement actually developed their relationship and gave them assurance that they truly love one another. sweet!
hey, but don't get me wrong. i am not saying that for you to have a good relationship with your partner, you need to have the same arrangement. open relationship is not as easy as it sounds. it is not like you are just fishing someone over mIRC, YM or text groups. although you might be hearing open relationship all over the place these days, sometimes even love itself is still not enough. it requires maturity and open mindedness. it transgresses above the concepts of trust and love. and above all, it is not something that you just enter just to justify one's infidelity and being polygamous. at long last there goes the connection that i am driving at.
basically, the bottomline of all these is that infidelity and open relationship are two different things. both don't mutually equates each other. open relationship is a mutual decision and actions given out by both parties involved. while infidelity happens one sidedly.
so please, stop claiming you are in an open relationship without your partner's knowledge--- and by the way, saying you're into it, doesn't make you look smart nor liberated either.
*sometimes i just have to be mean to stress my point.