Tuesday, February 23, 2010

open letter: why is love not enough?

sometimes, even the stars in a clear moonless night is not enough to cradle you to sleep. neither a kiss nor a hug would assure you of tomorrow. for even the most genuine romance falls short to spell out certainty.

dramatic as it may sound, but reality will tell us that love is not enough to sustain a relationship.

i think, its like a secret recipe. its not a matter of how common or rare the ingredients are. what utensils you use. nor how much passion you claim you've put on it. not even those who lasted that long could claim that they were victorious. for its always a continuous process--- a battle if i may say so.

for me, its a matter of having and putting the right ingredients in the right utensils with the right passion and in the right place and time.

and defining the word "right" is where all the challenge actually begins.

so in the end, its really about taking wise risks and making the best out of the series of its possible outcomes. instead of surrendering from that dark, hope-forgotten and self-inflicted sadness you've made.

love, the world is full of drama right now and it doesn't need another one just yet.

so cheer up. for life will still move on, with or without you tagging along.


citybuoy said...

it's easy to say that things just weren't right. truth is, some people just aren't meant to be together. you could change the time, the location, you could manipulate a plethora of different variables but at the end of the day if you're not meant to be together, it will never work.

they say the true test of a man comes when he chooses his battles. a man knows when to give up or tread on. thank you for this post. i feel it has opened my eyes to a lot of things. :D

take care, ewik.

anteros' dominion said...

minsan nang may nagsabi sa akin ukol rito..

subalit dahil likas na matigas ang aking ulo, hindi ako nakinig

nasaktan man, paulit ulit pa ring hindi nawawalan ng pagasa na darating din yun sa tamang panahon

thanks for this post

Chyng said...

i believe!
maintaining the love is really the challenge.

and once it's not for you, let go lang ng let go. shout and say "NEXT!" Ü

line of flight said...

real love is knowing how to relate to someone in the right way -- sometimes that means "being together" and sometimes that means "not being together". but it is real love that is able to get us to know the difference.

projection is an important aspect of the coniunctio between two individuals, and it is real love is the fire that clarifies the nugget of truth when the projections fall away.

Anonymous said...


♥nova-san said...

So, basically, there is no rhyme, reason, or recipe to love.

It either works, or it doesn't, and there is no real concrete explanation.

Just keep on loving, and hope that it will work out. After so many tries, it's bound to work.

Is that right?

rudeboy said...

Why is love not enough, ewik?

Maybe because some of us still get all starry-eyed and dreamy once we fall in love. And because some of us still believe in fairy tales, that once the words are spoken and returned, that everything will take care of itself and we will live happily ever after.

But love, like anything worth having, needs work. And there's nothing more un-romantic than "work." It quickly takes the bloom off the rose and some of us get disillusioned and like bumblebees, move on to the next convenient source of nectar.

I don't know if there's one recipe for love to last. But I know patience is a key ingredient. So is a good sprinkling of luck and timing. And heaps and heaps of work.

Yes, love is a four-letter word.

Darc Diarist said...

i've always thought that love is about commitment and choice. you commit to what you've chosen...

that's why you have to think things through over and over again. and when you've found that person worth committing to, then you try your best to hold on and work it out.

hay, so much for love...

red the mod said...

A fine line between loving and being in love. Often people fall for the idea of love, obsessing about imagine realities that they unconsciously project to their partners. Partly utopian, and sadly doomed.

Because reality is far more complex, and multifarious. Love should be enough to get us started. But to keep us there remains to be assessed. And, if I may, that love must be genuine.

Whatever that entails, one must define for himself. I believe that there is no such thing as a perfect lover, but two can be perfect for each other. Note that it will not be that way on the get-go. But if the two work on it, eventually they will be congruent and complimentary, the other half of a set of intertwined gloves.

Either that, or they break up.

the geek said...

feeling ko, may sumpa ang lugar na pinuntahan mo.hahaha

kiel estrella said...

way i see it: relationship = love + lots and lots of work. love's not enough when you decide not to work on it anymore.

line of flight said...

@kiel: amen comrade!

Manech said...

I must remember the comments about work, about how and why it is a part of the equation.

It scares me a little.

Now I feel such a noob.

Cheer up. But thinking about it, maybe you are right now. I mean, we just need posts like this to dispose the feeling. Right?

Anonymous said...

fight for it every moment,every day cause if its love,it is worth fighting for.if all things fail,well,you can always write.hehehe!

myClipBase said...


thanks for your really nice article.

marvs said...

i think the reason behind most rel doesn't last is because it started all with a "trade".. like for example... may pagkukulang sa'kin, at may pagkukulang sau, let's "trade" what i have and what you have so that we can complete each other... parang ganun... and after a few years, or months, mag rereklamo na kau sa isa't isa kasi you cannot put up with the expectation of each other kasi in the first place, nag "trade" lang kau... you felt that you were not complete and in order for you to feel complete you tell yourself that you have to love someone, and if you have loved that someone, that someone will love you back and you will tell to your self that you are loved... that i guess is the main thing why rel fails...

basta mahirap intindihin.. but i hope you do get my point...