Wednesday, July 2, 2008

pondering upon virginity

i must say that from the way things are going for me, it is indeed difficult to cope up with an environment quite new to you.
school so far, is good. despite the growing bulk of readings and cases that are being assigned to us by our professors each day. i really don't have much to say about it as of the moment. since i haven't got that many friends and experiences yet: aside from the fact that i pretty much spent most of my time either at work, commuting or at home.
on the other hand, work is pretty muck okay as well. probably, i am still enjoying it because i am still having the hang of actually doing something productive out from being a bum for more than two months last summer. so don't be surprised if two months from now, you'll see rants filling up my pages regarding work. but as of the moment i just try enjoying it as much as i can. especially with the fact that i was checking out a fellow newbie in the office. but it didn't take me that long to withdraw my interest.
A is your typical head turner. surprisingly, i am beginning to learn the taste of the like. A was the first person i met in the office. we became instant friends when we decided to sit beside one another. like the usual, it was pure silence at first. but eventually it proceeded into a conversation. then having lunch together and even accompanying me while i am smoking. nonetheless, the thing that struck me was when one of our immediate supervisor during that moment, that A will actually be one of my boss. sometimes it is really nice to know that there are good effects from being friendly.
as days passed by, i have learned so many things about A: has a daughter, has a partner from which they are just casual with one another and being one heck of a party animal. but don't get me wrong. there are no negative impressions about A being such. its just surprising for me to know that such a silent person could actually be such: that's down right broken stereotyping for you, ewik!
but wait... its not really these things that got my attention. as usual, it was one of our conversations that did. it was with this one time, out from nowhere A told me,
"personally, i don't believe in marriage. i am too young for that."
it took me quite sometime before i could even react with a lame, "oooohhhh...." finally, a more sensible topic that i could relate: regaining itself out of the tiring topic of "where to eat?," jollijeep etc.
A added that, "life is short to waste for a commitment that is binded by mere paper: that the best thing that you could do while you are young is to meet other people and enjoy each other's company---intimately, o di ba?! hahaha"
everything was actually going fine. considering that i am already getting and definitely can relate to the thoughts A beagn saying. for it is actually quite rare for one to meet someone with the same sentiment that you have in this lifetime. but everything crumbled down after the last line A said and left me still believing the rarity of such.

***

while i was riding a cab on my way to school, after work, i just realized so many things out from what happened.

in this time, it is a given fact that probably 7 out of the 10 people (between early adults to adults) you have encountered a minute ago, are no longer virgins. our perception of it are already anchored not only within the field of morality or mores. but also along the fact that modernity (through media, literature or what have you) have incorporated into us that there are so many other factors that reflects one's personality other than his/her virginity or sexualy activity. thus, it bears no great weight today than how it was before. atleast, in a metropolitan context.
nonetheless, like any other theories, facts or laws, there are always exemptions from these. regardless of how radical one's ideas or thoughts can be, there are still things that we need to consider and abide to achieve order, serenity and peace to oneself and to others: we all still need balance.
life doesn't revolve around sex neither good things in life only happens when you are having fun. we may plunge ourselves into a pool of it. but don't let yourselves drowned into it and probably the rest is up to you to ponder yourself.

25 comments:

. said...

I got depressed in first year college when I found out that one of my friends is not a virgin anymore.

It felt like I am losing the race to become "cool" and "advanced."

Anonymous said...

Ooooohhh. A seem cool. And hot. Hihi. Fantasy yun a. Hook up with a boss. Hihi. Too bad he's straight.

Bulaang Katotohanan said...

why?! why?! why do you people blog what i have in mind...*sulks in a corner*

... said...

7 out of 10. Hmmm... basta ako nasa remaining 3. Hihihi

Anonymous said...

The ideals of having a virgin wife are long gone. Sex will greatly add spice to your relationship (in a case of a bf/gf relationship). So, chances are, you need to testdrive the car before marrying it.

However, mostly for women, making it your pasttime hobby (especially with multiple partners) will greatly impact on your personality and how people will treat you. At some point you need to draw the line to gain abrupt respect from others, or otherwise be labeled as a w*ore. Nevertheless, sex is gooooddd. I'm not a pervert though.

@MUGEN
Sex is not your latest fad. Just because everyone else is doing it, doesnt mean you have to do it too. In summary, girls should do it when they feel the right time is due. and guys should do it after circumcission. Again, I'm not a pervert.

EX-LINK?

Anonymous said...

pare, i know i said i'll be on hiatus pero sau lang ako magcocomment.

tama ka abt the sex thing. napresrve ko ang ideals ko. i was 21 when i had my first taste of it. nawili for sometime, pero maagang natauhan.

i think nga, premature pa un kasi hindi pa ako handa nun, emotionally. pero eventually, people learn.

anyhow, good luck sa work. nice things are going for u. tc.

William said...

Was never pressured to lose mine. But having a bf did speed up the process. :P

Anonymous said...

i never thought of matters of virginity. i just wanted to have sex then. ngayon, certified re-virginized na ulit. chos!

Anonymous said...

great to hear na may company ka na agad sa opis.=]
astig ka, you're working and studying!

now i'm pndering about virginity too. heheh

Unknown said...

i also do not believe in marriage, and virginity? what's that? hehehe

KRIS JASPER said...

Oh, so u have an A as well?

hmmm...

Cant comment about virginity...

♥ N o v a said...

Wow... virginity... what a weird concept... hehehe... Well, in all seriousness, I was, shall we say, a late bloomer, and didn't experiment with stuff until I was in college. I'm glad I waited though. I look at kids these days and am amazed at how experienced they are sexually. It's kind of disturbing to me, because they all look washed up and worn out by the time they hit 25.

Your friend, A, sounds like a free-spirited person. I agree that life is indeed short, and that a commitment should not be bound by paper alone, but there's something real and comforting about knowing that a person is going to be with you for a long time. Random, arbitrary hook-ups can be fun and exciting, but often times, when the moment is gone, you are left feeling empty and alone.

Oh, and very wise of you to stay clear from office "romance."

TENTAY™ said...

*takip mata*
*na shock*
*tameme*

=/

mikel said...

it's weird when your high school girl friends talk about sex. i always think of them as forever chaste [a la mother superior, spc]. kakaiba di ba? [or maybe this is the pig macho in me talking] wala lang.

i do not believe in marriage, too. but i'd rather go for a virgin wife [kill the pig named mykel, now!]. old school pa din ako kahit pano.

Niel said...

i say find what's important to you be it sex or commitment, love or lust, one night stands or a long term relationship.

i think it's not a waste of time to go get what we want no matter what others say.

Dabo said...

pare.. nag nosebleed ako.. huhuhu

Mel said...

i don't believe people who proclaim their virginity nowadays...

Dabo said...

hay.. sex is just sex.. what is important is the strenght of character of a person..

that he don't do sex out of loneliness or ego thing or pride or any other motivation aside from horniness.. since sex, besides from mere excretion and exchanging bodily fluids--personality, emotions, cognitive processes etc.. also undergo activities that makes sex a complete experience

tragedy emerges when a person experience being human, only when he is having sex. --his need for self acceptance, recognition, control, equality etc..

oh well..that's life.

mikel said...

since sex, besides from mere excretion and exchanging bodily fluids--personality, emotions, cognitive processes etc.. also undergo activities that makes sex a complete experience--dabo

i agree. galing! biruin mo, may ganoong pag-aanalisa? hehe. asteg.

x said...

interesting post!

Mahiwagang Sibuyas said...

-Many abstinence programs have embraced the concept of virginity pledges, encouraging children as young as 9 to promise and wait until marriage to have sex. but, you are right--> "in this time, it is a given fact that probably 7 out of the 10 people you have encountered a minute ago, are no longer virgins."
so i rarely believe people who succumb to virginity pledges.

fornication din ang bagsak nila. hahahaha*

apir!

odin hood said...

i already realized back then that i wouldn't be getting married young, id be at least 30 if i ever get married. I didnt want to be a 30-year old virgin noh! kaya i was never bothered about losing my virginity.

Ely said...

I lost it a few days before i turned 19. And I was called a "late-bloomer".

Anonymous said...

Parang isinalarawan ni Wanderer ang aking iniisip ngayon.

Napansin ko lang, ang daming blog na may ganyang tema.

[chocoley] said...

honestly i agree with mr A.

his thoughts abt marriage is really true... perhaps, it is one one heck of time to incur yourself into a relationship you doewn't seem to ponder a lot of.

"life is short to waste for a commitment that is binded by mere paper: that the best thing that you could do while you are young is to meet other people and enjoy each other's company" --> exactly, bakit pa diba? and btw is this really included --> intimately (i'd say YES!)

i remember my prof in philo stating my opinion abt marriage.. ayun naloka siya sa sagot ko. hehe :) napaka liberal ko daw magisip for such a young age. (gush! do have to be in 30's to tackle issues like tht?) anyways na-share ko lng :d