Sunday, May 17, 2009

pay day

so how does someone suppose to start his week?

with a smile on his face and happiness in his chest.

two days before payday, i met some friends despite the lack of means to do so, financially. i told myself that money should not hinder me from doing the things that i want to do and things that will make me happy. so i met up a friend in magallanes that morning, accompanied him in touring chinatown and had the best noodles and steamed dumplings in town.
afterwards, we met a couple of more friends for dinner in this fancy restaurant in a popular mall. the night ended with one of the best conversations i ever had, enjoyed one of the best food i have eaten and heard one of the best stories that could ever be told. then i said to myself that the decision was indeed worth it.

a day before payday, with only a hundred bucks in my pocket, a friend asked me to meet him up to hear his problem. so i used the remaining value in both my lrt and mrt cards. later, i knew that was the last time i'll use those cards again.
we talked and talked as the day went by. fortunately, my mere presence uplifted and cheered him up. the smile that i drew on his face was something that made me feel an overwhelming appreciation to the small things i have done.

then payday came, i withdrew all my money in the bank and paid my all my dues: my rent, my credit card, laundry, and some debts. it was just now that i have realized that i only had a couple of grand left. i havent even bought some groceries. then, i accompanied my brother in UP and treated him for lunch. then later that night, i met up with another set of friends for a brief dinner and coffee. then decided to go to pasay to fulfill another life list--- WENSHA!

honestly, i am a massage parlor virgin and that i am proud of(hehehe). so all i did was to follow my friend as we make our way inside the place. we went to the shower room (separately ofcourse), the sauna and steam room--- and yes the steam room also looks very suspicious. until we reached the massage room. at first, i was quite hesitant in doing it since i know that i am big moaner when it comes to massage. but what the heck, i did not pay 600 something just for the splash parts.

the massage was hard and when i say hard, it was really hard. i even got bruises in my arms and legs and there were also a number of times when i needed to control myself from having a hard on because i felt that the masseur's hand navigated too much on my body. but it was all worth it and the harrastment paid off. i felt that there were already more gaps and spaces for stress to fill in again. but when we thought that it was the end of the package, it seemed like the establishment has still something more in store for us and decided to put it as the finale--- a buffet!
it was already 4 in the morning when i reached home. but 5 hours after, i found myself making a kite for the first time. what for?

ever since i was kid, i was always envious whenever i see a kite flying in the sky. i always wish that i am the kid who is flying it. this is the part where you will ask, how's your childhood?

we didn't grow up with our dad around since he worked abroad. while my mom only knows how to cook and take care of us. so i never flew a kite before nor made one.

so, a day after payday, together with another friend, we ate breakfast in UP first, jog around the oval and decided to fly the kite i made. despite the day just being so dull sunny with no wind tagging alone, i still tried and ran probably more than what ive jogged. there were numerous attempt but i was already satisfied seeing the kite 15 feet above me.

there was this cheesy feeling, about the kite while it was above my head. it was as if, i am attached with it, that i also wanted to fly and just for a time be above the entire place and moment. it or both of you are free.

later that night, before i went to work, i have recalled all those things that i have done and realized how happy i really was during those times. then i thought all the things that i have missed. all the precious moments that seemed to have been stolen from me.

a friend told me, to think about it first and don't rush too much with my decisions.

but i answered him, its been almost three years since i first thought, if this is the right place for me and i think its enough for me to come up with this decision.

another said that i should have atleast another plan or a back up.

i answered, its difficult for me to look for another one while i am in here. so i believe that in order for me to find the fulfillemt i am looking, i need to go outside the box first to look for it.

well, i have realized how we need to do the things that will make us happy first in order to remind us what we really want or need in life.

thus, although i only have more than a grand in my pocket, i gathered all my courage, hope and wishful thinkings and finally made it official after a very very long time.

its already been five hours now since i have set my heart loose and my lips to smile again. while i bid farewell to my last pay day.
i'll survive. i know, i will.

18 comments:

line of flight said...

this post reminds me of the time we went to UP press to buy some books direct and we took my lola for the drive and when we were leaving and there was this gigantic langka in the car. she and the driver had stolen it from a low hanging branch nearby!

jamie da vinci! said...

LA-MIEN!!!!!! hay naku. diet my well-toned ASS!!!!! ahahahahaha. gave your friend a dozen other places to try. trust me, those noodles are but the tip of a VERY large and VERY delicious iceberg :)

lazy john said...

Basta kasama mo mga friends mo even the simple things you do become memorable... Best of Luck sa kung anung plans mo...;p

<*period*> said...

kuya, minsan food trip din tayo sa chinatown....<*smile*>

Jason said...

saranggola ni pepe

Wave 19.2 said...

these people don't get..or i guess not...
you have again resigned from your job! Haaizz kapareha pa sana tayo ng account Ewik!
Anyways, it was nice chatting with you this morning. Now I know the reason why you need to back out before coming up of a better idea of what to do to fulfill your HAPPINESS. :D
The kite thingy is sooo emo...hehehe
twc will miss you..:D

Lance said...

(REPOSTing my comment) sorry i was logged in in our team's gmail/facebook account..haha

these people don't get..or i guess not...
you have again resigned from your job! Haaizz kapareha pa sana tayo ng account Ewik!
Anyways, it was nice chatting with you this morning. Now I know the reason why you need to back out before coming up of a better idea of what to do to fulfill your HAPPINESS. :D
The kite thingy is sooo emo...hehehe
twc will miss you..:D

xoxo krisler xoxo said...

hope you'll find the happiness you are looking for..goodluck!! =)

gillboard said...

makakasundo mo tatay ko tsaka ilan kong mga kaibigan na sobrang hilig magpalipad ng saranggola...

wanderingcommuter said...

line of flight: in UP before, it seemed like everything is for free. pero ngayon lahat na may bayad!

jamie: yun lang ang alam namin... ikaw dapat ang sumasama sa amin at itour kami duon. whats the use of having a chinese friend kundi mo naman kami itotour sa chinatown. hahahaha! jk!

lj: yeah, yun na lang din ang naghohold sa mga hopes ko. naks!

salamat. goodluck din sa iyo!

period: sure...
basta taya ka ha?! hehehe!

jason: hindi ko yun ninakaw kay pepe, ginawa ko yun! kontrabida. hahaha.

lance: hahaha. hayaan mo hindi ko naman mamimiss ang twc. basta kung may tanong ka, you know where you could PM me. goodluck din. ironic, kungkelan ako lumabas saka ka naman pumasok... ay parang ang bastos. hahaha!

krisler: hey thank you po!

gill: sabihin mo sa kanya, minsan kita kami tapos palipad kami saranggola! bilis!!!

Rain Darwin said...

king of wishful thinking.

naalala ko tuloy ang westife favorite ko yun.

Anonymous said...

You know how opposite our values are. Though we share similar things (such as finding ultimate happiness in the smallest of things) being a survivor myself, I would always look after my security first before jumping into the unknown.

I sometimes envy you. Being the eldest in the family could not afford me to take blind risks.

bampiraako said...

Ang tapang mo. At least nagawa mo ang first step at yun lang naman ang pinakamahirap sa lahat bago mo makuha ang gusto mo talaga sa buhay.

Cheers! Be the Best

the geek said...

this is your "pause" time...

make the most out of it...

the geek said...

this is your "pause" time...

make the most out of it...

HOMER said...

Wow! Sarap talaga magfly ng kite you feel like flying and floating while doing it.

I agree with you ewik that you shouldnt let money hinder you from being happy. Happiness comes in handy when you least expect it, and when you're there in that moment, Priceless!!

DN / DeathNote said...

"while i bid farewell to my last pay day. i'll survive. i know, i will."

Ang tanong, "How?"

jinnakexds3 said...

"while i bid farewell to my last pay day. i'll survive."
you're resigning from your job?
*reading comments*
oh... so you are resigning...
well good luck! anyway if that's your decision, and you think it would be for your best then do it.. (well you already did hehe)
i was anxious when i resigned from my previous work, scared of what will happen, what would come and would not come, if i would still be able to get a job, a better job... but resigning from my previous company i think was a good decision for me since i wasn't happy anymore with my work there, and now i feel better with myself.
well good luck on what's to come! you can do it..go go go! :)

and about the kite: i think that it's nice that you were able to do that.. flying a kite is something that i haven't done successfully before. i made lots of attempts when i was a kid, but my kite didn't fly as high as i wanted it. i needed help from someone then. and once it was already high above me and when it was handed to me i became scared because the wind was strong and as my childish mind worked i thought the kite might pull me off the ground together with it.. hahaha... yeah i was scared so i handed it back to him.
well i guess maybe someday i want to fly one too, and see if at this age, i would be able to do what i wasn't able to do when i was a child....
oh well..