*disclaimer: this post is not related with my personal life... defensive?! hahaha! i thank you!
recently, i have realized that falling out of love is probably the most difficult reason in breaking up. it is hard to explain since words fail simply because you can't concretize your reasons. there is even no perfect analogy to bring it up for the thought of it is as abstract as the origin of the relationship itself. some even wish that is caused by another person, a fatal mistake or lack on either party. for such it is easier explained than elaborating something that you have already lost or even haven't acquired in the first place.
You were the dream I hoped to see whenever I wake up before.
imagine. you waking up one morning, thinking that things are no longer working out for the both of you anymore. we could actually atest to this, for atleast once in our lives, somehow this had happened. you are no longer happy neither growing with your partner. and worst, you see your relationship more of a burden rather than something you enjoy and value. it can happen so fast that you don't even have the chance to prepare yourself for it.
We promised to break barriers and to make a difference. It was a smile of relief.
but the point of the matter is, how would you bring it up to your partner? would you think s/he would clearly understand the idea if you'll just simply lay your cards on the table and say that you don't love him/her anymore? would you even consider this as a fair game between the both of you? because of the simple reason, that such thing happens and feelings can abruptly fade away?
yes, there is such a thing as falling out of love. and sadly, this can also happen to anyone of us especially at times when expectations are not met or the spice, challenge and even the thrill is no longer present in the relationship. inshort, no one is excempted. it is only us who creates either the prevention or cure for it.
Ganun lang ba talaga kadaling bumitaw?
i believe that the mind works in a very complicated way and so is our emotions. usually, when the emotion is confuse, it is actually our rationality that attends to it: identifies, elaborates, interprets and even decides. on the other hand, when it is our mind that fails us, we resort to our instincts in order to come up with a decision. but what if both shut down in the middle of nowhere, is there a part in us that serves as a back up for them?
this is where the problem arises.
Alam ko'ng mahirap din ito para sa iyo.
all species copes in order to survive regardless how sensible or harsh the means could be. but in this case, most of the times, the ends don't necessarily justify the means.
for some, they resort in engaging with other people in order to suffice the need. ontheotherhand, realizing the value of his/her partner or perhaps to truly discover one's self.
while some don't have the guts to be honest. so they are force to hurt their partners in order for them to cultivate anger, making detachment much easier.
but for most of these people, the process of composing and verbalizing the actual thought of falling out of love is very difficult that they usually end up either paralyzed or short tounged with the idea of confessing: for the feeling of absence is abstract.
to wrap things up, falling out of love is nobody's fault. just like any unexpected things in our lives, it emerge at times when we least expect them: when our guards are down and we are in our most vulnerable state. thus, it is more hurtfully difficult.
for me, it is inevitable for someone to get hurt once s/he entered a relationship. if you don't want to inflict or get hurt, then its better not to fall inlove at all.
such actions will never be enough to define who or what a person is. people will always have their own judgement over others simply because of a certain story, from who and how they've heard it. thus, making it their story.
Salamat at Sayang...
at the end, all of us are slaves of our own motivations, desires, dreams and happiness. but the saddest part of it, is when we realize we are actually serving no one.