ambition: within a month vacation

More than a decade ago, when someone ask me what my ambition is, it would be one of two

things, either an architect or an astronaut. for some reasons, it was always an easy an automatic response. who didn't want to be an astronaut when he was a kid?

but years had passed, changes had occured without my notice and that ambition began to blur until it completely vanished from sight and now, i am trying to avoid the question.

exactly a month ago, i resigned from my previous company and promised myself to never apply in the

same industry again. i have decided to live my life all over and tried catching up all the friends and things i have missed. i gave myself a month as a vacation, thinking to start everything fresh.

week one:

i had one of my favorite comfort food--- banana split, which i haven't tried for the longest time in harbor square with a couple of new found friends. it was also the same night when i had a worthwhile conversation again for a very long time. i was surprised on how long we've talked over a single order of the parlor's highly

recommended german choco banana split (with a dash of pinoy), being shared

by the three of us.

from discussing the question, do you think with

how endless the universe is, there is life outside earth? to what is your deep

darkest secret?

it was also on the same week that i have decided to start seeing someone and guess what we had on our first date? yes, it is also another banana split, minus the figurative image that you have running inside your head. you should have known by now that i am, oh sooo, (w)holesome, right?

watched startrek, which was the initial plan. then it turned to consoling a friend who had iss

ues with the person he like, just to know three weeks after, they were already happily together.

had lunch with a fellow resignee, who will be going and staying in a remote fishing village in samar for good and will live a life completely different from what he grew up. for what? to live with his real family from which he will meet for the first time.

i accidentally broke my aquarium and was forced to buy a bigger aquarium which was not part of my budget plan, if i happen to have one.

cellphone just died out, another unexpected slash in my pocket. with only a couple hundreds left in my pocket. i decided to upgrade my psp and downloaded games, another attempt in making myself happy.

dined in marinara, metrowalk with a couple of friends, who were craving for crispy spinach. out of luck, it happened to be out of stock as well.then dined in the same restaurant the next night with more friends looking for the same dish.

watched ded na si lolo, that gave a me one great laugh after a very long time. i just missed that taste of the 90s comedy and reaffirmd my respect to roderick paulate.

week two:

dined in mexicalli, robinsons place manila. then looked for a gift for dave's birthday.

met a couple of baguio friends and attended another friend's party for his daughter's first birthday in windmills and rainforest in timog. there, i also met a long lost close classmate and servicemate from primary school. he also happened to be good friends with my baguio friends.

after the party, i rushed to dave's birthday celebration in mandaluyong.

learned or atleast condition myself to play badminton again somewhere near robinson's pioneer.

attended the philip's blogger party in route 196, katipunan. it was my first blogger party, flowing with pizza, nachos and booze. i met a number of bloggers and bagged home a new mp3 player for free. not bad for my first blogger party, huh?

watched angels and demons with the person i am dating. it was also the first time we held hands. i let go after a couple of minutes thinking i might be rushing too fast.

dined in abe, serendra then had a couple or more bottles of beer in gerry's grill.

inuman with che and alvin in tomatokick, up village.

met up a former orgmate in trinoma and gave a life and career talk over a venti.

attended my best friend's comic book launching project for a NGO that helps filipino-japanese immigrant children. got a free copy and free lunch on the side. then had coffee in koppirotti with my best friend and her partner.

week three:

met my thesis partner and her boyfriend and started enlisting for our master units. enlisting meaning waiting and begging for professors to accept us in the class. that is what you get if you're too stubborn to do the pre-enlistment online before the deadline, of course.

accidentally met another blogger as well, during the enrollment--- deathnote. the day was not that gloomy, afterall.

supposed to meet a friend and someone in glorietta. but a taxi driver ruined my day by claiming he thought glorietta was same as galleria. i needed to go out of the taxi and ran towards galleria under a heavy rain and bustling traffic. i ended the day, meeting someone instead and bought fishes thinking it will cheer me up, which it did.

margarita night in makati. che flaunting her new found margarita mix. surprisingly, that was one of the best margaritta i tried and conversation we had, just like the old good days with abel, marx and jamie.

inuman in tomatobomb in xavierville, katipunan with former bedan blockmates: isko, karen and ysa. listened to isko, who claimed have been retained for another school year because of st.jude.

met someone around 5 in the morning. then had a breakfast buffet in libis, where we first met

moh's birthday in holycow, trinoma

went to school and enrolled myself, my brother and another friend. it was one of the most exhausting day i had after i resigned.

met a friend from baguio and had lunch in burgoo, gateway. the bill was something we didn't expect, so we maximized the free wifi instead and scanned various online social networks to talk about people from college.

toured a friend from baguio in divisoria, from which she later had panic attack because it was beyond what she have expected. then met another friend from tarlac there. but accidentally saw another friend from ilocos norte.

tristan's farewell party.

met a friend in gateway and watched drag me to hell. i went out of the cinema house laughing my guts out. surprised how he screamed in falcetto, jogged and jumped off his seat. it was ridiculously scary! i enjoyed the film but enjoyed his humiliation more. hahaha! peace out!

week four:

found a new wifi tambayan in megamall, blendz. there, i tried starting a story for an anthology. then watched, something within, with jepoi and joaqui, but just got frustrated.

lunch-turned-to-magdamagan inuman in mang jimmy's, diliman to celebrate a former bedan friend who got retained in law school for another year.

sharon's vegan birthday celebration, where i got acquainted with vegan hotdogs, that tasted like smoked tofu.

went to an art exhibit in whitespace, pasong tamo. it was my first art exhibit in manila and way different from the ones i've seen in baguio but in a way gave me an inspiration.

dined in gumbo in MOA just to know how tasty and huge their servings were.ofcourse that was before i knew how much they cost.

dined in banchetto, ortigas, where we figured we no longer have the energy to go home. thus we decided to check in eurotel in cubao.

i recalled all these, as i walked home. though my feet knew the road i was taking, in a way i felt lost. an unexplainable loneliness began to creep all over my body and consumed me. probably because for the first time again, i felt i was alone. but then i have thought all the friends and things i have met and done and how happy i have been for the past month.

i have lost the concept of time and date. ive lost track of all my expenses, from which i still don't know until now, where it came from: knowing i have no savings at all when i resigned. basically, i just busied myself from doing the things i want. i didnt hesitate when someone invite me over. no work, no pressure. but then i figured that life is not all about whims and decadence.but also of responsibilities and obligations. thus, i will start to take actions and tomorrow, someone will seriously look for a job. thinking of bravely trying other fields such advertising, marketing, education or events, or better yet to have atleast have an ambition that i could stand on, atleast, longer this time.